…and the story goes…

A couple days ago I had a chat with my old mate. She and I worked in the same place in 2005, but now we’ve already had other jobs in different institutions. It was nice meeting somebody from the past, really.

Until then we talked about the foundation we worked for years ago. That’s a real bad memory for me, though. I was only a young fresh graduate who had to face a very inconvenient and “unhealthy” working environment. I didn’t like the job. I didn’t like the people. I didn’t like being there. Until I had to pay for it, by being terminated right after the first year completion of my contract. I should have been happy for that, but I don’t know why I was just crying at that time. I was not sad because I had to leave the place. In fact, I was grateful that God showed me the way to “escape” from the thing I hated the most. The only reason I was crying was that I did think about my family and myself. How would I do without a job? Wasn’t it difficult to find a new one? Yeah…silly thoughts that most fresh graduates have, you know…hehehe…

But one thing that I couldn’t forget just before I left the place was when one of my colleagues, who was actually not really close to me, sent me an email. She sent me a short story, with a very short message, telling me that I shouldn’t be worried, and I should believe that God has prepared a better one out there, simply because I deserved it. Then I started to read the story.

The story was about a mother who was travelling with her very sick baby on a public coach towards the hospital. During the journey, the baby who was usually very calm although she was very sick suddenly cried out loud and the mother couldn’t really calm her down. Other passangers started to be annoyed with the noise. Some of them started to look at the mother and the baby cynically, while the others who couldn’t stand anymore decided to get off earlier. This situation upset the coach driver. He thought that there would be no one who wanted to get on his coach if the baby kept crying like that. Finally he forced the mother to get off although they hadn’t arrived at the hospital yet. The mother begged the driver not to do so because the baby was very sick and she needed to go to the hospital as soon as possible. But the driver didn’t listen. He dropped off the mother and her baby in the middle of nowhere, and continued his journey with no mercy. The mother started to cry and panic, but luckily, a very generous man gave them a ride and promised to take them to the hospital as fast as he could. The mother was very grateful to that man, she kept saying thank you and wished him the very best along the way. Until then they were trapped in a traffic jam. The man get off of the car trying to find out the reason why there was such an unusual congestion. And there up front, they saw a very horrible scene where a bus was crashed and burnt. Nobody was alive in the accident. The mother recognised the bus, yup, that’s the bus whose driver had just forced her to get off of it few minutes ago…!!! She was shocked and thankful at the same time, knowing that her baby had (actually) saved her by crying out loud which had made them got rid off of the coach. She couldn’t imagine how it would be if the driver didn’t force her to get off.

Well…after I read the story, my heart filled with a little hope. Yup…maybe this was just the way He wanted me to get through. Maybe He just wanted to “save” me. And maybe He just wanted to lead me to a better place He’s been prepared…

Then when I had a chat with my old friend a couple days ago, I noticed that actually we experienced the same thing: being fired, from the same place we hated the most. But now look at us. She’s got a much better job in an international airline company, while I end up here, enjoying many precious things I do, see and experience, and also enjoying my new job as a government auditor.

Hmmm…What a life…

Duh duh duh…So much works to do…

That really can’t stop me from complaining…about my own life, my own duty, my own responsibility, my everything…!

Quite funny, though. Sometimes I really don’t think that I deserve this opportunity to “go back to school”. It doesn’t mean that I don’t thank God for what He’s wanted me to be, really, but…you know, many thoughts remind me of my capability, my capacity, my own self, and those really make me wondering, how come this “me”, who’s structured by 10% of brain, 20% of efforts, 30% of luck and 40% of prayer, could be a student while I know that many people with so much greater potentials just don’t have this opportunity. No wonder people are questioning (or sometimes underestimating) my ability to cope with any tasks, or any problems regarding subjects I’m dealing with. In fact, it doesn’t even make me upset (like I used to when people underestimate me), ’cause it’s true! I know nothing about this! Ask me anything, but not Accounting! Hehehe…so what the heck am I doing here???
Just like what I always believe, there must be a reson for everything. Maybe this is just the way He wanted me to be, shaping me into just another creature with different structure, so that it would become:

Me = 20% brain + 30% efforts + 10% luck + 40% prayer

Who knows…???

Dedicated to those people who desperately need these.

• Open up your heart for differences. It’s easy to say, but most people can only open up their eyes, not their hearts.
• Remember that although some people are not preachers or holy men, they will not tolerate once you disrespect what they believe.
• Always be careful in making negative statements about others’ lives, especially in public media, blogs, anywhere that can be accessed by others, because sometimes what you perceive doesn’t turn out that way. Once you realize, it’s too late, your unreasonable perception has led you to misjudge them, and it really makes you look like a stupid jerk.
• Better knowing others, including their choices of lives, ways of thinking, concepts they believe, are important and save you from misjudging them. You’d better shut your mouth up if you hardly know anything about them or never be in the same situations.
• Don’t you ever say that something happening in your life is unfair. There must be a reason for everything, and it must be very fair in God’s perspective.
• Don’t you ever use others’ lives as a joke, because you never know what you’re going to face tomorrow. Others’ pitfalls could be yours tomorrow, or even now, if God says so.
• Have a grateful heart, see everything half-full rather than half-empty. Once you really understand what it means, your gratefulness would turn out much more than just a word.

“Happy Eid Mubarak everyone…!!! I do apologize for all the things I’ve thought, said and done, which might offense or even hurt you.”

Yup…last week I celebrated the Eid Mubarak. Not so much different, really. The only difference was that I had it here, in Melbourne, without my extended big family. A bit weird, though. Knowing that I was only surrounded by my husband and friends. Anyway, it’s not the only thing that I called a different taste…

Right from the beginning of the fasting month, I had already felt the difference, actually. I used to be there, where most people do the same thing like me during the holy month: fasting. I thought I really missed my homecountry for a couple of days. The place where people respect those who are fasting, where I can feel the atmosphere, where I can hear adzan, tadarus and prayer each day…the things that I hardly find in here…

A week and a half before the Eid, my husband arrived to visit me. Thanks, honey…At least we had several days for sharing this new experience, fasting in the middle of many temptations for sure, hueheheee…

And finally the Eid’s come. I went to Uni for praying, but too bad, I was quite sad and disappointed, I must say. Starting from the crying babies who successfully made me unable to concentrate during my prayer, I know it’s such a common situation that I find almost every year, but for this time, it really makes me wondering. For those who let their children crying while they are praying, isn’t it weird? Isn’t it ego that we’re talking about? I do understand that they also don’t want to miss the chance to have shalatul Eid that day, but by letting their children crying besides them, disturbing others and even their own concentration? Isn’t it more valuable if they decide to “sacrifice” and chose to calm down the children and, at the same time, ”save” the others? I don’t know…Maybe I was so wrong…Maybe I would do the same thing once I have my own children…But, maybe I wouldn’t. Who knows…???

Another disappointment was when the khatib delivered his khotbah. I was in the middle of jamaah, and I knew that most of them were students, but I felt like being in the middle of the crowds of Vic Mart. Isn’t it, again, weird? Didn’t they know and understand that they were supposed to listening to the khotbah? Haven’t they grown up enough to shut their mouth up a little while so that their shalatul Eid that day wouldn’t be useless? At this point, I really missed my homecountry…where most things are valued in a way that they should be…

Anyway, I might be wrong, even so wrong. I do apologize if this post does offense any of you, guys. I’m just trying to be honest in what I’m thinking about a different taste I’ve seen, heard, felt, and experienced in here, that’s all…

“Once again, I do apologize for all the things I’ve thought, said and done, which might offense or even hurt you. Happy Eid Mubarak everyone…!!!”